Sex
I've been blessed with great sex for the past few days. Hooray for me! My husband has been acting the big stud, and I am quite convinced. Of course it helps that The Boy has been working and we have had some uninterrupted hours in which to play. Gotta love adult play time.
I did not get very into sex until I was with the man who is now my husband. We started our relationship kind of as a one night stand of exceptional and prolonged activity. Then I came back for more, and more. My first marriage was on the rocks after my ex's disclosure of pedophilia, so I never even felt guilty about carrying on an affair. So gentlepeople (and those not so gentle) it does go to show you that fantastic sex and extramarital affairs can lead to committed relationships.
Of course, after the initial explosion of constant, wanton sex, we did slow down. Once the kids moved in with us it got even more rare. But it was always good. For a while I was on Paxil for depression. This was before my pdoc figured out that I was bipolar. For those who are not familiar, treatment with SSRI anti-depressants and no mood stabilizer for someone with bipolar disorder can push said patient into rapid-cycling. Lucky me. So now, instead of a fairly predictable cycle of depression and mania, I have these very unpredictable and mixed episodes. So much fun. But back to the sex.....
On Paxil I was completely without sex drive. I remember breaking down and crying one day and explaining to my husband that I understood if he needed to pursue a sexual relationship outside of our marriage because I was completely incapable of fulfilling his needs. He just held me quietly for a moment before he kissed me tenderly and assured me that he had no problem waiting until I was ready. And eventually, after stopping the Paxil (and suffering a week of hellish withdrawal) we had a marathon weekend of sex, as my sex drive came back with a vengeance.
So sex has been on again, off again with us mostly because of my bipolar disorder. When I am down I have very little sex drive. But when I am manic I am insatiable, and crazy. But you can't have it all.
Right now, I am un-medicated and the sex has been fantastic. Well, not completely un-medicated. The Herb has been my friend, keeps the highs and the lows away much more effectively than lithium ever did. Lets me sleep too. Without any medication I lay awake, sometimes all night long. I have gone for months without sleeping the night through. I have gone for several weeks several time without any sleep. That is a very surreal experience. But I am getting off topic yet again...
But wait... so much writing.... not enough activity....
I did not get very into sex until I was with the man who is now my husband. We started our relationship kind of as a one night stand of exceptional and prolonged activity. Then I came back for more, and more. My first marriage was on the rocks after my ex's disclosure of pedophilia, so I never even felt guilty about carrying on an affair. So gentlepeople (and those not so gentle) it does go to show you that fantastic sex and extramarital affairs can lead to committed relationships.
Of course, after the initial explosion of constant, wanton sex, we did slow down. Once the kids moved in with us it got even more rare. But it was always good. For a while I was on Paxil for depression. This was before my pdoc figured out that I was bipolar. For those who are not familiar, treatment with SSRI anti-depressants and no mood stabilizer for someone with bipolar disorder can push said patient into rapid-cycling. Lucky me. So now, instead of a fairly predictable cycle of depression and mania, I have these very unpredictable and mixed episodes. So much fun. But back to the sex.....
On Paxil I was completely without sex drive. I remember breaking down and crying one day and explaining to my husband that I understood if he needed to pursue a sexual relationship outside of our marriage because I was completely incapable of fulfilling his needs. He just held me quietly for a moment before he kissed me tenderly and assured me that he had no problem waiting until I was ready. And eventually, after stopping the Paxil (and suffering a week of hellish withdrawal) we had a marathon weekend of sex, as my sex drive came back with a vengeance.
So sex has been on again, off again with us mostly because of my bipolar disorder. When I am down I have very little sex drive. But when I am manic I am insatiable, and crazy. But you can't have it all.
Right now, I am un-medicated and the sex has been fantastic. Well, not completely un-medicated. The Herb has been my friend, keeps the highs and the lows away much more effectively than lithium ever did. Lets me sleep too. Without any medication I lay awake, sometimes all night long. I have gone for months without sleeping the night through. I have gone for several weeks several time without any sleep. That is a very surreal experience. But I am getting off topic yet again...
But wait... so much writing.... not enough activity....
posted by Stoic Stranger at 6:40 PM
3 Comments:
As someone who merely suffers from depression, I've always envired bipolar people their manic phases (I know, I know, that's just sick). Am I to assume that you are in the middle of an up phase and that the up phase results in heightened sexuality?
Well, it's not so sick. Sometimes I just love my manic spells. I get a huge amount done, I have lots of energy, I need little sleep. On the down side, I have auditory and visual hallucinations, and there are vast government conspiracies enacted against me. Even my cats are conspirators. I have gone on 30 thousand dollar shopping sprees (ouch). I have had one night stands with strangers (and I am normally a very reserved person sexually). Naturally, I get in a lot of trouble during those times. I count it good luck that I have not wound up in jail or a mental hospital. I am lucky to have an understanding husband who takes each phase as it comes along. Of course, the heightened sex drive during the manic phases probably helps him be more understanding.
Yeah, for most guys, that would be a plus.
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